Parting Gifts...

Often in my past I used to turn to the page as my own form of therapy. I would write and thus in some ways at the end it was as if the sorrow, pain, worry, and confusion of my adolescent life would somehow pass through me and onto the page leaving me feeling somewhat better and almost always with a better perspective on things. It is with this somewhat selfish hope and a deep desire to pay tribute to a strong man that I embark on the next few lines below.

Earlier tonight, amid the rain outside the windows and my feverish glances around the house, I debated on taking another dose of cough syrup faintly hoping that when I woke up from this round I would finally be better. Then the phone rang and I knew... It was my aunt with the news we had all been dreading for the past several months. My uncle was finally gone.

George Monroe Johnson Jr. was a father, a husband, a brother, a son, and my uncle. I will always remember the summers when I was small and he would come by our house and play with me in my small K-Mart pool that I loved so much. Or a few years later when he moved to the lake and I would go visit him and my Aunt and he would take me down to the dock, slices of bread in hand, and amaze me by feeding the masses of fish that would come to the dock as we dropped tiny pieces of bread into the water.

He also taught me more than he could even imagine in the past few months of his life. I will always remember the soft words he whispered to me a few short weeks ago and draw strength from them for years to come. He said, "Jacob, never forget that God loves you and will always be with you." You see, my mother had told him that I was gay shortly after he told her about his cancer because she wanted to finally express to him in the time he had left how proud she was of me as a young man. Well now I know in his own way that by saying that short phrase to me he was telling me that no matter what God loves me and accepts me for the way I am and so does he. It was one of those moments where something so simple at the onset can mean so very much in the coming days... and for that final gift I will always be grateful.

Rest in peace Uncle Joe... I will always love you.

+Jacob

Comments

[Brandy]

Jacob,

I want you to know that I am thinking about your family during this hard time. If there is anything I can do, just let me know. Your uncle sounded like a wonderful man and I know he was extremely proud of you. I love you.

Brandy